


Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance

by Basingstoke



Category: Cabin Pressure
Genre: Community: cabinpres_fic, F/M, Fem!Douglas, Genderswap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-08
Updated: 2012-06-08
Packaged: 2017-11-07 07:25:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/428433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Basingstoke/pseuds/Basingstoke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: <em>What I'd love to read is a mature, experienced cougar!fem!Douglas (can't think of a name for her, sorry...) who knows exactly what she wants and who she wants to get it from. </em></p>
            </blockquote>





	Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance

Martin's first response when Diana sat in his lap was terror. His second was arousal. She did, after all, have a rather magnificent bosom, all the more impressive when it was propped beneath his nose.

"Now then, _mon capitan_ ," Diana said. She crossed her wrists loosely behind Martin's head.

"Er," Martin said. "Are you drunk?" His voice wobbled. He swallowed.

"Not for the past eight years."

"Oh," Martin said.

"Grab my arse before I get bored," Diana said.

Martin cupped her bottom with both hands tentatively.

"Squeeze. Are you a virgin, by the way?"

"Not for the past--well, um, a bit. Do you really think this is a good idea?"

"Have I ever had a bad idea?"

"Candy drop on your son's birthday party," Martin said.

Diana scowled. "You did the maths, as I recall. You failed to factor in the temperature rise."

"Wait, you can't blame your bad ideas on me! We definitely shouldn't nnnngh," Martin said, cutting off as Diana moved her hips. "No, we, oh God. Not fair!"

"I indemnify you against any blame for this decision," Diana said.

"Don't have a condom," Martin gasped. Diana was _writhing_ , how the hell did she do that?

"How fortunate that you possess not only a mouth but delightfully long fingers," Diana said.

"Oh God."

*

Diana naked was all plump round curve. Martin splayed his fingers over her breast, trying to encompass the full soft weight, but it still overflowed on all sides. His bony hips sank into her belly painlessly. "Like marshmallow," Martin said, filled with awe.

"Excuse me?" Diana narrowed her eyes at him.

"Oh God. I meant. Soft. And um. Comfortable? No, those are bad. Squishy! No. I'm sorry!"

Diana put her hand over his mouth. Martin blushed silently. "Under this marshmallow fluff is enough muscle to snap you in half, I'll have you know," she said.

Martin nodded.

She lifted her hand and Martin said, "I like it! It's nice!"

"Best stop there."

"Very nice! Beautiful."

"Don't overdo it."

"I'm not," Martin said. He was on his back, Diana sitting on his thighs, and all he could think about was the prospect of that ample round bottom enveloping his cock in its hidden depths. Except that he didn't have a condom, damn, damn!

"Fingers," Diana said. Martin proffered his fingers. "Do you know how to use them?"

"I think you'd better teach me," Martin said.

Diana smiled. "Martin. You have hidden veins of wisdom after all."

*

"Little more, little more, little more, oh, that's the ticket!" Diana breathed.

Martin continued licking and crooking his fingers in the approved manner. He did much better at applied examinations than paper tests.

*

Once Diana's breathing slowed to normal, she looked at Martin with hooded eyes. "Well. Well, well, well. Martin, Martin, Martin."

"Yes, yes, yes?" Martin was still hard, painfully so. He crouched on hands and knees beside her, waiting for the green light.

"I do like younger men," she sighed. "What's your favorite bit of me?"

Martin's eyes snapped to her magnificent breasts. "Um, I couldn't say."

"Liar. Come here. No, here. Right here. And give me that--yes. There we are. Your turn," Diana said. She squeezed her breasts around Martin's cock as he straddled her chest. "Go on, then."

Martin groaned happily and thrust into her soft, ample, (fat, but he's not allowed to so much as think that, even though he really really likes it), accommodating cleavage.

*

The next work day, they were on standby. Carolyn left the portacabin to chase Arthur out of the new life vests ("They're so ORANGE. They make me think of...ORANGES").

Diana crooked her finger. "Look what you did to me."

"What?"

Diana opened her blouse and exposed her bosom. Martin caught his breath (and squeezed his legs together as a jolt of arousal shot down to his stomach)--there was a faint round bruise on her breasts where he had thrust against her. "Captain doesn't know his own virility," she said.

"I'm sorry!"

"We'll have to remember the condoms next time," Diana said. Martin swallowed. Diana winked.

the end.


End file.
